Of Bats and Girls

This must be one of the funniest scary stories that has happened in our family in a long time. As most of you may know, I am a carpenter. This week as I was working on the soffit of an old 2 story house, I found bats on a couple of occasions. Ben took the first one home with him to show his little girls, and succeeded in scaring his mother and sister as well.

So I got to thinking... I grew up with bats in the barn. To me they were as common as the cows. But... my children may not have seen one up close. They probably know what bats are just from reading about them in books, etc. But I can't remember them ever having a close up encounter with one. So being the nice, loving, kind Father that I am, I decided to educate my children about bats. I caught the last one that I found and put it in a plastic container in my van. I carry some of that handy stretch wrap in my van to tie together loose boards, etc. So I cover this plastic container with it. But I was concerned about animal cruelty so I had put some leaves, etc. in the container for it to hide under, etc. I also cut some slots in the plastic film to allow it breath. My intentions were to show it to the kids and release it again. I like bats and the work they do to eat bugs and mosquitos, etc.

Of course this all happened just a couple of days before deer season is to open. I need another gun for Sam to hunt with. My brother Eli so graciously offered to let me borrow one of his guns. So right after I got home from work and ate a bite I took Millie (8 years old) with me and went to get the gun. Of course in my rushing around I forgot all about the bat in the van. Bats are nocturnal and it was dinnertime for the bat. Eli lives an hour from my house, so it was quite a trip after a long days work.

Everything went well until I was on my way back home. As I got close to Macon (about 20-25 minutes from home) I noticed that I would better stop at Macon and get some gas. I glanced over at Millie. She had fallen asleep. Then... I saw something moving on the dash. My pet bat had escaped! Apparently it couldn't hear to fly around until I slowed down coming into Macon. Millie woke up when the humming drone of 70 MPH slowed to 55 then 45 and finally 35.MPH. The bat flew somewhere to the back of the van. I couldn't see it anymore. I stopped at Casey's to get gas and momentarily forgot about my bat. I was looking at the gas prices that had just increased to 2.99 per gallon. I started pumping gas when I remembered that Millie had woke up and was still in the van. I asked her if she wanted to come out with me. Of course she did. It seems the bat had decided it was time to fly around and look for a meal. Poor Millie was frightened half to death. She did not know that bats don't eat little girls for dinner. She is an avid reader and had read something about Vampire Bats, which must have made the whole thng a hundred times more frightening for her.

After paying for my gas and a couple of candy bars, we proceeded on our way back home. The bat made a couple of flights through the van on the way home. My biggest concern was that it would end up in my face or something and cause me to swerve at 70 MPH. It could cause an accident.
When we got home Millie promptly got out and ran to the house. I turned on the dome lights and proceeded to look for the bat. I could hear it crawling around but it was not flying. Apparently bats can not jump up in the air and start flying like a bird. Instead they have to climb something and drop into the air to start their flight. After trying for a while I finally managed to catch it. By now the boys were by my side and the women were watching from inside the safety of the house. I took it up to give Millie a "safe" close up view of it. But... I was locked out of the house! Apparently, my wife is not fond of bats either. I didn't know that...or did I? After showing them the bat through the glass, I put it on the side of the porch post and it soon flew off to find a new home.